Tuesday, July 26, 2005

"Five of a kind"

I have not been overly motivated to blog lately. Work has been taking a toll on me. Things are beginning to settle down, so I thought I would share this little story. Sorry but this story has nothing to do with poker.

This Saturday my entire family met at SeaWorld at San Antonio. My sister's family from Phoenix. My Mom, Dad, Brother and his family, and my other Sister and her family from Houston.

I know we had a great time, but hurding five families, containing 9 grandchildren around a crowded park is not an easy task. We decided to top of the event by seeing Shamu Rocks Texas. Our 8 year old insisted on sitting in the splash zone. Myself, our daughter, our son, and 4 cousins all took seats in the front row right in front of the glass. At least I had the foresight to hand my backpack to my sister. I wish I would have handed her my Texas Longhorn cowboy hat. Oh well!

The music began and Shamu comes zooming out and does a huge flip in the center of the pool. The full house rocks with excitement. Next I look through the glass to see "5 of a kind". They were black and white, but definitely not spades or clubs. Then I look above the pool to see another "five of a kind". Five large white tails. I started laughing my ass off, because I knew what was about to happen. I grabbed my Longhorn hat from my head and tucked it under my chest. What a waste of energy. Those five tails pushed so much freakin water over the glass barrier that they need to change the name from splashzone to Tidal Wave. Instantly soaked only to have two more walls of water come right at us.

The Tidal Wave subsided. I look at our daughter and she is bawling her eyes out and screaming at the top of her lungs "It hurts". "What hurts?" "My foot!" "Why does your foot hurt?" "My blister." I then look at our son. Now he is crying too. "We want out of here." I lead them up the stairs through the crowd. knowing that for us the show was over. Our daughter cried the entire time. All I could do was worry about my nieces and nephews whom we abandoned. I had to trust the fact that three of them were old enough to know what they needed to do to find us after the show. We left them laughing almost as hard as I was.

This put a little negative on otherwise what I thought was a fun day. Thanks to Grandma we saved $24 on the tickets. I did not appreciate the pile of puke in front of the ticket booth. The event definitely did not start off on the right foot. It also took us 1 hour to get out of Austin. TXDOT needs to only work nights.

Lessons learned are:

If you have children under 10 years of age and they want to go to the splash zone, just say no!

If you want to want to smell like a salty fish, then sit in the splash zone.

If you wear your favorite hat do not worry about protecting it. Note: Plan to air it out to get rid of the fish smell.

If you have a blister and salt water gets in. It burns! Wear socks! Or insist your children wear socks even if they do not want to.

You can not beat "5 of a kind"!

Play on!

Monday, July 11, 2005

"Miscellaneous"

Due to work and life I have not had a chance to complete the Arizona trip report and my demise on Party Poker. I thought I would quickly post a couple of miscellaneous items.

Toast to Mr. Lonnie Zwiener - Mr. Zwiener is the father of one of my best friends from college. Mr. Zwiener passed on July 1, 2005. I will forever appreciate his humor and kindness. His legacy is a fabulous family of 4 boys and 13 grandchildren. Our hearts and prayers go out to the Zwiener family. I was fortunate enough to maintain their yard during the early 90's. Mr. Zwiener gave me an open invitation to enjoy a cold beer everytime I worked in their yard. The boys did a fantastic job honoring their father and I raise a beer in honor of Mr. Zwiener.

Microsoft software sucks - Our daughter has been beginning for this game called Zoo Tycoon 2. She scratched and clawed and saved her money. I agreed to cover the taxes. She spends $30 of her money, which is a ton for an 8 year old. She tries to install in on her computer. Sorry your driver does not have the correct speed to support this game. We tried to install in on her brothers computer (although I doubted it would work). Sorry but you do not have enough processing speed. We tried to install in on my office laptop, which is reasonably high end. Sorry but this package is not compatible with the Radeon 7500. I look up this game on the internet only to find that it is not compatible with about 100 video cards. What kind of crap is that? I decide to return the game at Target and exchange it for the older version which should work. Sorry sir, but you can only exchange it for the exact same item. What the f***? I basically let a couple of target managers no I was very angry. The sited copyright law. I agree that some persons would go home copy the game and try to return it. Would I be this pissed if I had done that? My apologies to the Target managers they should not receive the brundt of my frustration. Microsoft deserves the slam! Upon contacting Microsoft they apparently have a 100% satisfaction garuntee policy. I have not heard back from them since leaving them a message on Friday. If they refund our money I will apologize and move on, but until I get a refund Microsoft Sucks!

Play on!

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Arizona trip report and Casino Adventure


Warning if you are looking for poker content please scroll down and read the sections labeled in blue. This is definitely an Uber post for me, but unfortunately not Guinness fueled.

June 18 - drove to El Paso. We made it to Ft. Stockton before we stopped for sandwiches. We did make a quick pit stop in Stonewall TX to pick up some fresh peaches. We made it to El Paso in about 9 hours. Otherwise uneventful.

June 19 – We had a great brunch, consisting of Machaca and chiliceles. Drove to Scottsdale and after Tucson I believe our son pointed out every cactus along the way. He does now know the difference between cactus and cacti. Stopped at a gas station outside of Tucson, where some goofball almost ran over my wife and kids. The gas pump took 20 minutes to pump 10 gallons. I stopped pumping because it was so damn slow. We made it to our resort, which is nicer that we imagined. They had a beautiful 4500 sq foot pool area with a huge waterfall and hot tub. Kids and I went for a late night swim. Let’s just say the water was a little cold.

Funny moment – We were trying to get our five year old to read a book on the trip. We kept saying “I do not know how”. Of course we know he does. We keep pushing him to read a book. Finally he says I do not know how to read “Giggle Giggle Quack”. “Oh we thought you did not know how to read.”

June 20 – We decided to go to a Desert Botanical Garden, Papalago. We saw cacti from all over the world. We saw lizards, quail, hummingbirds, and ground squirrels. We stopped for some prickly pear iced tea, which was very refreshing. Afterwards we went to the old section of Downtown Scottsdale. We did some window shopping and had lunch at a place called Rusty Spur Saloon. There was a singer named Jimmy who had a great voice and was very entertaining. His mother was there and had to prevent him from singing certain songs with our kids there. We had a buffalo chicken sandwich that was really good. Grilled chicken breast smothered in Buffalo wing sauce. We wrote our names on a dollar bill and placed it on the wall in a predominate place. At the end of each year they take down all of the dollars, have a poker run and donate the money to charity. We finished the day at the pool. At least some of us did. I went on to play poker at Casino Arizona. I am now off to the TPC Desert course, so the poker write up will have to wait. Let’s just say I left the casino a lot lighter than when I entered it. Stay tuned.

It is now Wednesday June 29th and I am sitting at my in-laws in El Paso Texas. I have a bunch of things to report, but I need to first continue my first trip to Casino Arizona.

June 20 (cont…) After we had lunch at the Rusty Spur we got in the van. Let’s just say the van did not cool down in that 113 degree weather. The misses was not too happy. I tried to explain to her that it has always acted that way in this type of weather, but she was having nothing to do with it. We got back to the condo and I took off to see if I could find someone to look at it. The only place I found was finished for the day. The recommended I get Jiffy lube to put in Freon. Well I did not trust them because they had no means of diagnosing if a problem existed and I was not about to pay $100 to end up with 0 Freon.



*** Poker Content (Part 1) ***

The kids finally fell asleep around 10:30 PM. I kissed the wife and off to Casino Arizona. I really did not have a clue as to what to expect, but I had $200 of mad money burning a hole in my wallet. Casino Arizona is split into two locations, but I went to the Talking Stick location, which I knew had the poker room. I walked in and I was overwhelmed. I liked the fact that this was a smoke free poker room; however, my table was right at the edge where smoking was permitted. Despite the occasionally smoke it really was not bad. I had never played holdem in a casino before. Another cool aspect was that you did not hear the constant clanging of one-armed bandits. I wasted no time and signed up for the $3/$6 tables and I was quickly assigned to table 3. I bought in for $50. I got crap cards the entire time, but this is where I learned about the “Kill” pot. Twice I got involved in a kill pot only to get nothing on the flop. Let's just state for the record that “KILL pots can be expensive”. I won a few hands here and there, but for the most part money was flying out of my hands. There was one kill pot where I flopped a pair of kings. I believe I was holding KQo. The flop came JKA. I bet the $6 only to get raised. I folded. It turns out that the raiser was holding QTo for the flopped nut straight. I made a comment to the table that I folded 2 pair. They made comments like “nice lay down”. Truth is I did not have shit, but I wanted the table to think I dropped a big hand! (Hee Hee)

There were two other hands worth mentioning. There is a bad beat jackpot and from 10:00 PM to Midnight the Jackpot for holdem was around $56K. I was in the BB with 56s (spades). The flop brought me an open-ended straight flush draw. I just had to see it to the river. It was expensive and of course it did not hit. Had it hit I would have won 25% of the jackpot, because the winning hand was quad 7s. Damn! About 30 minutes later the table got excited again. The board showed three aces. To win the Jackpot Aces full of tens needs to be beat. Unfortunately the jackpot was not to be ours. I did meet a couple of Longhorn fans. Most of the players at the table were solid. There were two players that were bigger fish than me. The decent pots I won were off of them. Before I called it quits at 2:00 AM, I had burned $120 of my bankroll. I was not happy and I believe I had some tells. Oh yeah! Once I played the hammer from the BB. The flop came 7KJ. I caught a piece of it, but just could not play it. I did chase a few times, but felt I had to since I was not getting any cards. I did have trip aces once only to have the board show four clubs. You guessed it that I did not hold a club. Sigh! Oh yeah! I did not win a hand until I had bought a beer. I much prefer the free drinks in Las Vegas, than paying $5 per beer and they did NOT serve Guinness.

*** End of Poker content Part 1***

June 21 – I got up at the crack of dawn and headed out to find a place called Fletchers, which was recommended by my brother-in-law. I got there about 7:25 AM. They stated it would take about 45 minutes to take a look at the AC. I asked if there was a place to have breakfast. They stated that there was an IHOP a little ways down the street. I started to walk. I did not see an IHOP and I quickly made a decision that it was to hot and the return trip was going to be even hotter. I stopped at a gas station and got a Code red and a bag of pretzels. Breakfast of champions! It turned out that our AC had about 12 ounces to much Freon and could not cool in these temperatures. They tested for leaks and set the amount to the correct levels. Now even a penguin would like out van! My hat is definitely off to Fletcher’s service. They treated all of their customers with respect and appeared to be efficient. Once again our van caused us money on vacation, but $144 was much better than $1000 plus.

I made it back to the condo by 8:45 AM, so we decided to continue with our original plan. We packed up the cooler and set out on a drive via the Apache trail. I will spare most of the details, but it was a beautiful drive. One key fact we were not quite in tune with was that 28 miles of this journey would be on dirt road. At times it was like riding a bull. We had to creep along at 10 mph. The strangest part was that a thunderhead appeared out of nowhere. I saw a bolt of lightening hit a ridge. I turn to my wife “did you see that bolt of lightening?” She replies “No, but I see smoke!” We witnessed the start of one of the fires that was to burn over 60,000 acres of desert. It started to rain and we got behind two bikers. They did not look like happy campers. They finally waved us around them. Finally we arrived at the Roosevelt damn. Next we went to Tonto National Forest. We informed the ranger about the fire, but they of course were already aware. She recommended that we not go up to the Indian ruins, because of lightening, the heat, and numerous swarms of bees. Besides we were too hungry anyway and the kids do an hour long hike. Yeah right! As usual we concluded the day at the pool.

June 22 – This was a fun day for me in that my son (5 years old) and I planned to play golf. The TPC was a couple of blocks from our condo, so we opted for that one. The stadium course was expensive from my point of view ($75), so we opted to play the Desert Course. Unfortunately the Desert Course greens had just been plugged and sanded. I expected to get a discount, but there was none offered. I did not press the issue because we were dropped off, so really had no choice ($50). As expected the course was fairly empty. Our son got to hit a ton of golf shots. It was a challenge to him to try and drive the ball over the desert. He was successful a few times, but did result in 3 lost balls. On the back nine I decided to let him play an entire par three from tee to green. It was an amazing in that he actually got on the green in four and three putted for a seven. I think that is pretty good for a 5 year old. The remainder of the day was spent relaxing at the pool.

June 23 – Finally we get a chance to spend the day with my sister and her family. We decided to go to the Phoenix zoo. My sister had some free passes! Thanks Sis! The kids were great and we had a good time, but it was hot! The one cool think was that we were standing there watching the giant Galapagos turtle. I opted to move to get in some shade. Well right where I was standing came slithering this 6 foot gopher snake. The snake would have probably totally freaked me out if I had not moved. The turtle keeper apparently had experience with snakes and picked it up. The kids were thrilled. She released it on the other side of the turtle cage in the shade. Nature meets the zoo! We spent the remainder of the day at my sister’s doing the slippery slide thing, an apartment pool, and grilling some delicious steaks. After getting slightly lost Peoria we made it back to the condo around 10:30 PM.

June 24 - Today my sister and family, including Uncle D, who had been out of town on business, were coming to the condo to enjoy the pool. I took the kids for a morning swim, and then in order to kill time we decided to find a place to eat a good lunch. We headed toward downtown Scottsdale with a couple of places in mind. Unfortunately the one place was only open for dinner. We settled on a place called Grimaldi’s. It turned out to be an excellent choice. We had an oven-fired pizza topped with sun dried tomatoes and ricotta cheese. Ok half had those ingredients and the other have of course was pepperoni for the kids. We enjoyed ½ carafe of Chianti. Around 4:30 PM our guests arrived. Uncle D and I had a few drinks. We thoroughly enjoyed the pool. The kids were all great. We grilled some hamburgers and hotdogs. The visit was short but an absolute pleasure. Hopefully Uncle D and I can do some business together. I plan to conduct some free quality assurance on his web site when I return to Austin.

*** Poker Content (part 2) ***

My last trip to the casino only left $70 burning a hole in my pocket. It was all money won on the internet, so I figured so what if I lose this found money. For the record my wife will never understand! Everyone was tucked in around 10:00 PM. I decided to check out the other casino, Ft. McDowell. I mean this is a casino adventure. It was a longer drive, but I was there in about 30 minutes. The place was pretty full. The differences were numerous slot machines all ching chinging and clank clanking. The poker room was very small and way in the back. I sat down at the $3/6 table and bought in with my $70. The first dealer I had seemed to be sick. I lost one decent sized pot when my opened straight did not fill. The next dealer sat down and complained about his back, stating that we had to make sure we pushed the cards and chips far enough for him to reach without hurting his back. “My chiropractor is not available until Monday.” I did not have much sympathy. A couple of hands later I thought I was the big blind so I put out the $3. Of course I continued to get crap cards, so after a raise I mucked the cards. The very next hand I was told that I was the big blind. I stated I had just been the big blind. Dealer’s response “To bad you made a mistake, you are now the big blind.” I did not need a dealer being rude to me. I played three more hands then grabbed my chips and headed for the door. The sad part was I had donated $30 in that lame casino. First impressions are everything, so I will not be returning to the Ft. McDowell casino.

I headed back to Casino Arizona where at least I was treated with respect. Now with only $40 left of my bankroll I needed to play smart. Well not if you get great cards. I sat down and found ATo. The flop comes with TTA, giving me a boat. I bet it hard all the way and had two callers until the turn and one caller at the river. A couple of paint cards came on the turn and the river, so I was worried about the guy having an over pair and a larger boat. I took down a nice sized pot. I tipped the dealer and stacked my chips. There was a lady at the table that was a bit crazy to play with. She was 32 years old and told us how she was divorcing her husband of three years who could never give her an orgasm. She now had a man that that could and was able to please her 8 hours at a time. I had a few comments, but held my tongue. There for awhile she would bet to the river blind. The funny part was for about 30 minutes she won every hand. I took one large pot from her with her silly antics, but I did lose to her set of tens, when I had top two pair. She did not appear to be drunk, but she was a little obnoxious, especially when she started to tell the orgasm story a second time and that she pays her soon to be x-husband $2000/month in alimony. As expected her crazy play caused her to lose her stack. I certainly did not mind. I ended up calling it a day at 2:00 AM with $80 in my pocket.

*** End of poker content Part 2***

June 25 – Today was the day for laundry and R&R. We went to the pool a couple of times. The evening trip to the pool we had margaritas and smoothies pool side. Not to much exciting happened until I told my wife I was going back to the casino. I just had to go for it.

*** Poker Content Part 3 ***

I was determined to play smart and win some of my money back. The place was packed since it was a Saturday night. I put my name on a long list for the $3/6 tables. I got placed at table 44, which was quite different from the other areas of the poker room I had played in. There was one player with a large stack of chips, but he did not stay long. As usual I did not get any cards. Mucking the cards gets pretty old. The lady to my right had just won a nice pot with pocket queens. I make a comment loud enough for most of the players to hear. “So what is it like to get a face card?” She laughs and says, “They are nice if you win!” The very next hand I drag the pot with A7, where my 7 was the high kicker. Imagine that! The very next hand I look down to see big slick suited. I raise it up although this is a dangerous hand for me. I lose more often than I win. I kept raising. The lady to my right goes “I guess you finally got some face cards” and mucks her hand. The flop and turn bring me nothing, but I keep pressing the bets. Whew everyone folded to my aggression. I think my comment about face cards set things up to play aggressive. I had turned my $80 into $110. I contemplated getting up and leaving, but wait I came here with found money. I have only been playing 45 minutes. Press on!

It was about 1:00 AM. One side note that I thought was interesting. One of the dealers noticed that some cards were marked. It was interesting in that they had just brought a new set up as I arrived to the table. The cards were indeed marked with a small faint white line. My theory was that the card shuffler was causing it. FYI – every poker room needs card shufflers. He called for a new set up when he noticed on the other deck that one of the aces had a thumb nail mark in it. Hell I could barely see it, so I am not sure how a cheater could see it. The dealer also talked about how the “eye in the sky” now detects chemicals professional cheats used on cards. Apparently they would put a powder on the cards that could be viewed with special glasses. This brings a whole new meaning to the reason everyone wears sun glasses at the tables.

OK back to my final three hands. I limp in with pocket 5’s. Inside I am praying for a 5 to hit the board. I think I only had a set once in three days and I was ready to win bug. The flop comes 5sQhKs. I raise. I get re-raised. I raise again. There are two other players. The turn does not help, but I keep firing. Everyone calls! The river brings another spade and I did not improve. The guy to my left hit the river flush and the lady at the other end of the table had hit a set of queens on the flop. I was dead meat without getting another five. At this point half of my stack is gone. A few hands later I am put all-in with A4s. It was my turn to hit the flush on the river and I drag the pot. I think I am now at $16. Should I leave? How do I explain the loss of $80 to my wife? Man this is found money and I came to gamble. The next hand was perfect. It was a family pot. Everyone called the BB, so the pot was already large. I was holding ATo. The flop comes ATX. I get all of my money in and the pot is close to $60. The turn brings another spade. I am chanting no flush, no flush. Of course the guy next to me stayed in with 56 of spades. I was sure the AT was going to bring me back to life. I am broke! I wish everyone good luck and head back to the condo pondering the words I will say to my wife.

I think in all I played very solid poker. I have mentioned this before, but I need to work on my strategy when cards run dry. I did chase the nut flush a couple of times only to come up empty handed. After the first day jitters I think I erased most of my tells. I am definitely going to work on my reverse tells and my table banter. I also feel it is time for me to buy a poker book in an effort to raise my game to the next level. I blew $200 in 11 hours at the $3/6 holdem tables. I do not think that was too bad. Fortunately for me the second two sessions did not bring many kill pots. Thanks to Casino Arizona for being a gracious host and I hope you spend the rake wisely! I definitely can not wait until I find a way to Vegas. I like to drink a little when I play, so free drinks would add to my banter. Texas legislature needs to hear this loud and clear. Bring poker to Texas NOW!

*** End of all poker content ***

I am going to post this for now. I will finish the Arizona trip report in another segment and I will write a report of my demise on Party Poker.

Play on!