"Gets nasty at the poker table"

Before I continue our vacation saga I must share this poker story. Friday night I decided to enter the 9:00 PM No limit holdem freeroll at Paradise POker. Top 50 earn a spot in the final tournament to win a trip to Europe. Odds almost the same as winning the mega lottery. Any rate there were almost 4000 players. We started out with 1500 in chips. I held my own for a long time, then I took a bad beat. I do not even recall what it was but I think my top two pair got burned on the river by a gut shot straight. This entire time I had been minding my own business with saying an occasionally "good hand". These two players started bantering childlishly back and forth. Using names that just are not appropriate for a poker table. The were acting like teen agers. Well the worst of the two got moved to another table, so things were back to an enjoyable atmosphere.

I later had a set get beat by a larger set so I was down to about $900. Guess who comes back to the table. Yep, Mr. Potty mouth. He also liked to go all in. As soon as he sat down he started attacking me. Called me all kinds of names. One of which was ... velvetta cheese... I simply stated "I have been here minding my own business and you have to attack me. What gives with that? Are you sure your are old enough to be at this site?" The insults kept flying. By the way this bozo also liked to go "all-in". Being down to $900 I needed to make a move. I was dealt QQ. Bozo went all-in, so I immediately called. Everyone else folded. He of course had trash and I doubled up. The very next hand I am dealt QQ. Thats right again! Back to back pocket ladies! Mr. Potty mouth again goes all-in again. I immediately call. I doubled up again! You could sense cheers around the table. Oh when this started he had roughly $30K. The third had I get dealt pocket Kings. Yes that is three pocket pairs in a row. The pre-schooler went all-in again and this time I called. I think at least two other persons called. A king hit the flop! I won again! I had gone from $900 to $17K in three hands. I was patient and about 5 hands later I was head to head with Mr. insult. Of course he went all-in and I called. I had him out chipped! I eliminated him from the table. There were cheers and rejoicing! I think if it had been a true brick and mortar everyone at the table would have bought me a drink.

I believe it was pure luck. A more realistic belief might be that the algorithm at paradise is anything but random! Finally perhaps it is he who talks smack eventually gets smacked!

I worked my way up to about $40K. Unfortunately I got to conservative. I had top two pair get beat by another straight at the river. That was a $10 K hit. Hind site I should have continued to be aggressive. I got moved to a table were there were some larger stacks. Bottom line is that I finished 121st!

When I play online poker I try to make it a pleasant experience for everyone. I did not rub those three hands in a row in, but if he could have only seen my smile when I eliminated him.

Play on! Be NICE!

Hello Hello Hello! Seems like I have been gone forever. We just returned from a wonderful vacation on Monday. There will not be much poker content, but I can say that wireless technology is a marvelous thing. More on that in a minute.

Our vacation started with 17.5 hours on the road. We left Austin at 4:15AM and arrived outside of Knoxville TN around 8:00PM. We stayed at a Holiday Inn Express. We had to settle for a smoking room. Yuk! Now traveling with a 4 year old and a 7 year old is usually not easy, but our kids were wonderful. Parents the key is electronics!! Make sure there is a TV with VCR or DVD in your vehicle, then add walkmans and gameboys. Oh yeah! Feed them some sugar and take plenty of snacks and Caprisun juice sports drink. It also helps if one of the stops is at a fast food joint with a playscape. Let them burn some energy while you fill up the car. The weirdest thing about day one was a guy dressed like a girl at Burger King. Sheeesh!

We slept in and caught the continental breakfast. Off to Edgewood Maryland. Two quick comments - there were way to many freakin 18 wheelers on I-40 and US-81. People who speed up and pass, then slow down in front of you so you have to release your cruise control NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE! I finally pulled into a rest area just so this gal would move on. Pass me. Slow down! I pass her. She passes me slows down! This went on at least 10 times. I was hot! We ate sandwiches and played a little soccer with the kids at the rest area. Oh yeah! Take a ball!

I will have to continue this saga later. Misses needs the laptop! :o(

We make it to DC in great time 2:00ish. All of a sudden on 95 the traffic comes to a screeching halt. Two minutes into this mess and several cus words later the "service engine soon light" comes on. Here is where I get cursed from my wife for not replacing the timing belt or doing proper maintenance. I did get the oil changed and tires rotated. I pull over just to make sure there was nothing blantantly obvious wrong and that we still had oil. Everything checks out. I kept hearing this strange noise in the trees. All of a sudden I get pelted with about three cicadas. I close up the van and we move on.

Here is another great lesson for travelers. DO NOT rely on Map Quest directions. The did us well until we got near the hotel. We drove around for 40 minutes. Oh yeah the kids loved the long tunnel in Baltimore. We found the Hampton Inn. The second great lesson is Hampton Inn's have free wireless internet. We ate dinner at a local crab place. Only one of our party ate crab. It was marginal, but if you like blue crabs then this was probably a good place. There was a gentleman sitting next to us who had a pile of crab shells. Our son (4) asked me if he had eatern hundreds of crabs. I said why don't you ask him. He did. The man just laughed and said I have eatern to many, but not hundreds. paty's co-worker had a rental car, Ford Explorer. The cool part was the GPS system. Leslie kept saying she told me to do this the she scolded me for doing that. I am like who is she talking about. The GPS was a she! :O) Very cool gizmo!

Now for some poker content. We got back to the hotel and everyone turned in, but me. I pulled out the laptop and started playing poker and enjoying a nice cold Windsor and diet Sierra Mist. I was playing at Paradise poker wear my bank roll hand dwindled down to around $4. I was playing conservative, but really aggressive when I had the nuts or I thought I had the best of it. I quickly grew my bank roll by $3. I then lost with pocket Ks to an ace on the river. Definitely a sign that I should turn in for the night.

Now I guess it is Thursday. I quickly forgot the date and time once I started on this vacation, so I will probably just make this one long rolling saga. My wife had to work so off she went to her secret destination. I of course had the task of getting the van looked at. I called a Ford Dealership in Belaire Maryland. The person I spoke with was extremely nice and said to bring in. We got there around 9:30 AM. Sir it is going to be $100 just to run the diagnostics. Ouch! "OK" is my reply. "Do you have someone who could take the kids and I to the mall?" "Absolutely!" Off to the mall the kids and I go. I figured I would have to kill tons of time so I forced the kids to see the entire mall. We bought a DVD-R since my better half was freaking out that we had not backed up years of digital photos. I had bought a package of DVD+R on the recommendation of a Best Buy employee. Yes sir the should work! I even showed him the computer I had. Well of course our DVD only works with DVD -R. Man I am always in the dog house! :) One hour after fiddling around the mall and the kids asking me to buy everything under the soon. Just imaging this - walking casually through a mall with two kids chanting "We want Harry Potter Gameboy game". The cellphone rang to save the day. By the way this was one of those situations I can say thank God for cellphones. It was Ford. "Sir, it is a blown sensor that monitor the engine pressure." "Is it critical?" "We recommend that you replace it." "How much?" part is $225 and with labor diagnostics and your free cup of coffee it will be $450. Ouch Double Ouch! What would my wife want me to do? Please fix it! How long will it take? We have the part so it should be ready in about an hour. We continued playing in the mall. It seemd like 30 minutes later the cellphone rings again. Sir your van is ready. There is a driver on his way to the mall are you ready to pick up your van. Well Yeah! We settled up and one of the drivers gave us some pointers on Williamsburg VA. Plaza Ford you rock! I could not believe we were in and out within 2 hours. Peace of mind!

I need to stop this post to take care of the kiddos. I will continue later. Good night!